It’s literally 2:31 in the morning. And I’m laying here with racing thoughts. Again. For the 3rd week in a row. So much on my mind without even knowing where to start honestly.
if I had to start somewhere the first thing that comes to mind is how empty I feel. For some reason I can’t shake it and I can’t understand why. It’s draining me. I feel like I’m here to occupy a space in society without a purpose. just kinda hangin out.
don’t feel bad for me though because that’s not what it’s meant for.
It’s called bipolar disorder.
It sucks. It’s actually really shitty. Sometimes these thoughts come and go, and sometimes they most certainly overstay their welcome 🙄 i Happen to be in the middle of a time where I would greatly appreciate if they left now.
Even through all the negative thoughts I’m doing my best to give myself credit for understanding my illness this time around. Not as much as id like to but a year ago I wouldn’t be able to tell myself that this will all pass. that how I’m feeling is temporary, even though it fucking sucks, I know I won’t feel like this forever. And big credit for forcing myself to type this shit out 😩 it is very personal and it may not mean much to you, but it’s a huge step for me.